I'll begin by saying, whatever one does in life the most important thing above all else is to retain a strong sense of privacy. If you don't protect your privacy it may take decades to recover from damages to you emotionally, psychologically and even financially. Since single women are more prone to privacy violations then men are, this post is designed especially for such a vulnerable lifestyle as I've had as a single woman the past 30 years.
Most of my life has been a struggle of obtaining a basic sense of privacy from parents, roommates and all kinds of curious strangers in the workplace. I eventually learned the hard way that there are forces in this world that will exploit another's observed weaknesses. Consequently, If such a vulnerable person's insecure with themselves they become easily baitable for others to gain additional information to exploit.
First, I'll provide a little background on the issue of privacy I'm about to reveal. I made a huge mistake in my 20's allowing complete strangers into my life who were playing mind games being into power and domination. I learned life is just a game to these kind of people with narcissistic agendas. Most people avoid these privacy issues by having a significant other, but those who don't unintentionally open themselves up to curiosity, social judgments and even personal attacks. In fact, I'm still recovering from the recurring patterns that emerged from initial privacy violations early in my life.
The Human Kingdom In Many Ways Isn't Too Different From the Animal Kingdom
If you're a single woman without any significant other, you're most vulnerable of all and therefore prone to others' manipulation and possible abuse. The only way to deal with being a single woman is to protect one's privacy and only become involved with a small number of those who truly care about you.
Single women without boyfriends have to guard themselves especially from the wrath of heterosexual men in particular. You've also got to consider when letting someone into your personal life who that person's close to because they may eventually talk behind your back. It's been my experience men often view their girlfriends as personal informants to scope out their territory and domination of other women much like lions do within their prides. It took many years for me to realize human behavior often mirrors the animal kingdom's hierarchical and territory marking systems.
For instance, I had a pen pal of sorts a few months ago of a woman who moved to another state I had met at a business meeting. After writing back and forth intensely for several months, a former long distance high school boyfriend entered the picture who began dominating her writing to the point of her only referring to him while ignoring the content of my emails. I took offense of course and realised this person cared nothing about me whatsoever so I ended corresponding realizing I was just someone to pass the time with until she landed a boyfriend.
I try not to allow myself to be used by women to pass by time prior to their finding a new boyfriend. To me that's usury, not friendship. These women often care nothing about me, only themselves and I've learned the hard way they will turn on me in the blink of an eye if their boyfriends or husbands say so. In other words, the power mongers are always there to use, abuse, offend and keep me oppressed if I let them. Am I available to attend or even perform singing at their wedding, their baby shower, or babysit so they can go out on the town? That's been my life story of mostly acquaintances using me for their personal event celebrations caring not a thing about me. One has to have low self esteem to allow that kind of abuse and usury to continue.
Breaking In a Woman Like a Horse? I'm Serious!
Over the years I've also witnessed an obvious desire of certain individuals to break down my natural immune system by deliberately exhausting me and testing my limits. Some men think of it as breaking in a woman like they would a horse. I became aware certain people were testing my emotional capacity wanting to break me because I didn't follow the social protocols. I eventually learned management people in the workplace want a predictable environment where they don't have to second guess and will take measures to make sure people conform by either making or breaking them.
The best advice for single women who plan on staying that way is you must be on guard 100% to prevent the entry of abusive and manipulative people. In this day and age I wish you all good luck with that, especially if you tend to be above average attractive. It's clear that single women will continue to have a hard time in this culture, especially as the economic and world situation deteriorates. Society fights very hard to make being single very difficult. The biggest message I continually got was "is it worth being single to go through all this trouble and hardship?" Then the big jab was "You don't know what you're missing!" My answer to "was it worth it" is yes, but I could have made it far easier on myself had I known how to simply protect my privacy from the curious, predators, scavengers and users.
A few tips from 35 years of trial and error experiences in living situations and the workplace:
1. Don't give out unnecessary personal information about yourself to acquaintances.
2. Don't feel you have to conform to social pressure to reveal personal information about yourself such as if you have a boyfriend, have ever been married, etc.
3. Be highly cautious of anyone who wants to know you personally in the workplace. What is their political status at the company and motivations for wanting to be chummy?
4. Keep your ego in check because it could get you in trouble with men in particular. Life to many people's nothing more than a political game to win or lose.
Finally, in the case of being a single woman, be aware that women who act as your friends can turn on you in a blink of an eye at the orders of any man who has political or personal ties with them. Young women especially tend to be spineless, weak and prone to male manipulation and domination. Such women actually enjoy conforming to the male dominated workplace and won't hesitate to put you in your place of where they believe you should be.
Lastly, I found arrogant corporate men tend to think they can mold single women into what they want for them in the workplace. Many men even view themselves as surrogate husbands grooming women for future relationships. These men will treat women very well in many cases until someone shows resistance to either submitting to having a boyfriend, being a religious woman dedicated to God, or dating men. By the way, talking to the gay men is a big no no, that's something else I learned. If the powers at be sense rebellion against heterosexual men of any sort, you will eventually be traumatized, humiliated, terminated and ultimately forced to fend for yourself.
The biggest problem in our culture today is a violation of basic privacy by those who think they have a right to know every detail of your personal life in order to dominate and have control over you. One can nip these control freaks in the bud by simply not providing any unnecessary information to them. In other words, privacy equals peace of mind.
Disclaimer: I'm only providing my personal opinions from life experiences as a single woman, not professional advice to the reader. In fact, my personal experiences may possibly be considered unusual and uncommon for all I know since most women appear to be on the ho side of life (at least that's what they've freely shared with me about themselves over the years).
For specific information on protecting your privacy, and/or disabling your iPhone location feature so Apple executives can't track your every move, please seek a qualified professional. Just make sure not to give them too much of your personal information.